I've been thinking a lot about life purpose lately. Have you ever just sat and thought, "Why am I here?" I don't mean physically, but more why have you been given life? What is it that drives you to get out of bed every single morning? Why do you do the things that you do?
One of my struggles since I moved back to Atlanta has been, "what is my purpose?" Why am I still here on Earth? Have you ever stopped to think exactly why you do your job? Perhaps to have money..why? To buy food and have shelter...why? Because they are my basic needs.
Living in Atlanta, these basic needs are not necessarily the first thoughts that people have. It's more like, "to have a nice car" "to have a big house" "to impress others". Why do we strive for things like that? Why do we spend so much time stressing about money?
I often dream of what the world would be like without money. I could do so much with my time if I didn't have to worry about paying rent or buying gas for Pedro (my car). I could spend all of it on the thing that I am most passionate about - sharing God's love with youth.
Today, my boss was praying over me as he always does (I have the best boss), and he said something that makes me question if I am really living out my purpose. "God, help Lauren to live out Haggai - to do something so great for You that it be doomed to failure unless You be in it."
Yet, I have this little faith, wondering how I am going to pay for things and make it through the year. I want a stable job, a stable life, and yet as a follower of Christ, the only thing stable is Him. We are to live a life of adventure and precariousness. We are to live on the edge if we are to truly do what we believers are called to do.
How do I do that? I'm not quite sure...
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